This is all you need to know

 1.  I am not shy; I am quiet.  And since it has been said that silence is golden, I believe that is why God made us with two ears but only one mouth… so we can hear twice as much as we say.

 2.  I am an introvert.  Luckily for me, I’m very comfortable with my own company.

 3.  Neither of these make me a snob, although I am occasionally perceived that way.

 4.  This has never bothered me, mostly because I have always had a very strong sense of who I am.

 5.  I met Malcolm, the love-of-my-life, my knight-in-shining-armour, in high school band class … yeah, we’re both trumpet-playing band geeks.  Although he’s the only one who can say, “I remember one summer at band camp….”

 6.  I chased him relentlessly all through high school, and he finally asked me out a week before graduation.

 7.  Fourteen years later, after an on-again, off-again relationship and many “life experiences”, I finally wore him down, and he married me on August 8, 1992!

 8.  It was another 12 years before I finally started to grow up… I guess I was a late bloomer.  In that time, I almost lost him.  More than once.  Privately, I refer to that span of time as “The Dark Years”.

9.  We are very happy  now, and although there is still the odd bump here and there, our marriage is strong enough to weather the occasional crap that life throws our way.

10.  Although I am easily amused, Malcolm is the only one who can make me erupt with laughter so intense I end up gasping for breath with tears running down my face.  And he does this almost daily.

11.  Since huge belly-laughs are purported to be an excellent abdominal workout, I am perplexed why my waist isn’t much smaller.

12.  I have some OCD tendencies.  These cause great amounts of eye-rolling and head-shaking (Malcolm) and general amusement (everyone else).  But I think I’m quite normal.

13.  I was born with a severe “motherhood-gene” deficiency.  Cats I could handle; kids, not so much.  Things are much better now though, as I mellowed with age and finally grew up.

14.  I’ve discovered, much to my surprise, that little kids can actually be very entertaining.  Malcolm’s daughter (from his first marriage – one of those “life experiences” I mentioned) has presented us with two grandsons (so far…..), and I thoroughly enjoy their visits.

15.  Although I babysat a fair amount when I was younger, to this day I have never changed a diaper.  I’m actually rather proud of that in an obtuse sort of way, and I feel no great urgency to expand my repertoire of skills.  So this means if we’re babysitting the grandsons before they’re toilet-trained, Malcolm can never be more than 10-15 minutes away… or I’m going to be in serious trouble!

16.  I am typically very laid-back, easy-going, and always on an even keel.  But if you want to see my claws, make a pass at my husband.  ‘Nuff said.

17.  When I am hurt, I tend to withdraw into myself to heal and to examine the situation from all angles.  During this time I rarely sleep more than two hours/night.  Which admittedly, doesn’t always make for rational decision-making.  So if you’ve crossed me recently, and you notice I’m much quieter than usual, beware… I just may be planning your impending demise.

18.  I believe that just about any negative can be turned into a positive with copious amounts of chocolate.

19.  Although I firmly believe in equality for women, I am a throwback to my mother’s generation.  One of my greatest joys in life comes from keeping a nice home, preparing delicious, nutritious meals, and generally making Malcolm’s life as easy and pleasant as possible.

20.  I think this is a good place to stop, because even as interesting as I am, I think even “I’d” start to get sick of me if this post went on much longer.



  1. Linda B said,

    Well, I think you’re a very interesting gal! And I enjoy your writing! I’m glad I stopped by!

    Did you REALLY not ever change a baby’s diaper???? That’s an amazing feat!!! Was it pretty smelly around your house when your kids were growing up???? LOL If I waited for my husband to change our kid’s diapers, they’d have rotted to death!

    • thelmamontyr said,

      Hi Linda. Welcome! And thanks for your kind words.

      It is absolutely true that I’ve never changed a diaper. But perhaps it would have seemed less amazing if I had also mentioned that I don’t have any kids. And I didn’t start dating Malcolm again until his daughter was 3 1/2 years old and already trained … not that I planned it that way! LOL

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